Artifical Intelligence Online (AIO)

*Inside the system Isis and Chibi-Isis are relaxing while Nitsuj is reviewing the second part of SAO*

(Isis): Sure is peaceful.

(Chibi Isis): Yes. All sectors within the system are secured no threats or viruses detected at-

(Isis): I sense it too. There are three of them.

(Chibi Isis): And they each match the specifications of our program as if they were created by Nii-chan as well.

(Isis): Impossible. I know for a fact he’s only created you and me. It took him weeks to finish programming me and even creating you took him quite a bit of time.

(Chibi Isis): Which means these AIs must be from the same person who created that meanie Chibi Seras.

(Isis): High possibility. If so than we have to eliminate them.

(Chibi Isis): I’ll contact Nii-chan and-

(Isis): No. Don’t bother him. He’s in the middle of a review, interrupting him now would only make him worry. Besides even if we told him there’s nothing he can do to help us in the system. We’re on our own for this one. Let’s go.

(Chibi Isis): Yes.

*both fly off to where the rogue AIs are. They arrive and see that the AIs are three beautiful girls. One has light purple medium length hair, wears glasses, and looks like Yukiko from Persona 4. The other has long crimson red hair, an impressive bust size, and looks like Himari from Omamori Himari. The final one has yellow hair, wolf ears and tail, dark-skin, medium bust size, and looks like Hibiki from The Idolm@ster*

(Isis): Hold it right there intruders.

(???): Well, well well. If it isn’t the cute little AI girls come to protect their system.

(Isis): Mind telling me who you guys are. I like to know what to put on your tombstones after I defeat.

(???): Oh~ she’s a spunky one just like Chibi Seras said she was. Very well, it’s only fitting that you know the names of your killers. I am Mira the analyzer and spiritual advisor of the team. *points up her glasses* A pleasure to meet you.

(???): The names Shizuku. Heavy hitter and fighter of the team. I enjoy martial arts.

(Isis): I can tell you enjoy tanning by that dark skin of yours. Still those breasts of yours are quite in eye sore.

(Shizuku): What? Jealous? Don’t worry most guys like moderate size breasts such as yours.

(???): You can call me Yin-Yang. I’m a wolf girl AI ninja who’s as fast as lightning and a student of the arts of ninjutsu. Nice to meet ya Isis and Chibi Isis.

(Isis): The fact that you know our names and mentioned that annoying little child Chibi Seras I take it that you’re here following the orders of this mysterious master of yours and have come to get my master.

(Yin-Yang): Correct. Don’t take this personally but are master has been riding on us to get rid of your master and if we come home defeated he’s totally gonna kick are asses.

(Shizuku): But before we get to him we’re gonna take you two out first. After reviewing the video Chibi Seras sent us before dying it’s obvious that you two are the biggest threat in this operation. Take you out first and Nitsuj will fall like a house of wood.

(Mira): I think you mean house of bricks Shizuku but nevertheless you are right. This is also revenge for destroying our comrade Chibi Seras. However, if you step aside and let us just kill Nitsuj now we’ll spare both of your lives and allow you to meet our master. I’m sure he be willing to accept someone of your caliber. What do you say?

(Isis): I say no. I’m quite happy with my current master. He may be a little insane and can be a troll at times but there’s never a dull moment when he’s around. Plus he can be quite charming and thoughtful as well. Also, no offence but you’re master sounds like a very boring person to send his attack dogs to do his work for him.

(Chibi Isis): I agree with Nee-chan I rather stick with Nii-chan.

(Mira): Pity. Than you leave us no choice. *Pulls out blade disc* You have just signed your own death.

*Shizuku pulls out her gauntlets and Yin-Yang pulls out her daggers*

(Isis): Let the dance begin *pulls out Exile*. Chibi Isis provide support while I take them on.

(Chibi Isis): Got it.

*Isis charges at the three AI girls. She gets stopped by Yin-Yang who uses her daggers to stop her sword attacks. Sparks fly as their blades strike one another. Yin-Yang moves back and Shizuku comes in with her fist swinging. Isis manages to dodge all of her punches and lands a kick on her to temporary stun her. Yin-Yang charges at Isis once again trying to land an aerial strike with her feet but Isis dodges the attack and steps back to prepare for her next move.*

(Isis): AI sword style: Boukaheki Taihou (Firewall Cannon)

*A giant blue fireball shoots from Isis’ sword and attacks both Shizuku and Yin-Yang knocking them to the ground. A flying disc brushes past Isis face. Mira throws another blade disc at Isis trying to slice her.*

(Mira): Impressive. You seem to be able to do quite well in handicap fights. You have my praise.

(Isis): You’re not bad yourself. I’ve never seen a program use blade disc to fight before.

(Mira): Yes, they’re quite useful when fighting quick opponents and setting up traps where you least expect them.

*The ground where Isis is standing begins to glow red and multiple blade disc appear from the ground to surround Isis.*

(Mira): You’ve activated my trap. Yubiwa no Kaosu (Ring of Chaos)

*As the blades are about to strike Isis a force field appears to stop the blades*

(Mira): What!

(Chibi Isis): Nee-chan activated my magic. Shiryou Kara (Data Shell).

(Mira): There was nothing in the data about that chibi being able to use AI magic arts.

(Isis): That’s because she just started learning it this month. She doesn’t know many attack spells yet but she’s progressed far in her studies of it and has become very skilled at creating powerful defenses and casting support magic. *Pulls out AI pistols* she’s not the only one with a second slot. Butoukai no 1000 Baito (Dance of a 1000 bytes).

*Isis begins fire a barrage of bullets at Mira who uses her disc blades to protect herself but Isis’s bullets destroy the blades and hit Mira causing her great pain*

(Mira): AHHH~!

*Isis gets within point blank range of Mira where she shoots her into the air, jumps up to wrap her legs around the neck of Mira and does a Frankensteiner which sends Mira flying into Shizuku and Yin-Yang.*

(Isis): And they say you shouldn’t try wrestling moves at home. Chibi Isis now!

(Chibi Isis): *says a bunch of stuff in binary code* Shiryou Tsubusu (Data crush)!

*A large boulder appears above Mira, Shizuku, and Yin-Yang and comes crashing down on them*

(Mira, Shizuku, and Yin-Yang): AHHHH~!

*The boulder smashes them*

(Isis): That takes care of them.

*As Isis and Chibi Isis are about to leave the boulder explores and Mira, Shizuku, and Yin-Yang come out okay.*

(Shizuku): That was a good amount of combo moves you did to us. But now it’s on.

(Mira): You two get ready. I’m going to land the first hit.

*Mira takes out multiple blade disc. She covers her body in them to turn her body into a weapon of blades. She begins to charge at Isis.*

(Isis): So you can do more than just throw them at me?

(Mira): Yes. I call it Full Body Blade.

*Mira constantly attacks Isis until she’s able to destroy Isis’ sword leaving her defenseless. Once her sword is broken Shizuku comes in from behind and strikes Isis and the back with a punch.*

(Shizuku): Shotgun fist!

*As soon as Shizuku’s punch struck Isis’ back a cloud of smoke appeared which sent Isis flying forward a little bit.*

(Isis): AHH~! I feel as if someone just shot my back with a shotgun.

(Shizuku): I hope so. These gauntlets also have rounds of shotgun bullets installed in them so whenever I hit someone I can also shoot a round to give my punches a little more power.

*Isis gets back up but Shizuku is right in front of her and grabs her face*

(Shizuku): Shotgun Palm!

*Isis gets shot in the face and falls to the ground where she lies motionless*

(Chibi Isis): Nee-chan!

*Chibi Isis takes out her two swords and tries to join the fight but she gets knocked away by Yin-Yang who slams her to the ground.*

(Yin-Yang): Sorry, but this is an adult party. Little kids like you should just stay here and take a nap.

*Yin-Yang than walks up to Isis where she stomps on her chest forcing Isis to wake up.*

(Isis): *Coughing*

(Yin-Yang): Oh, you’re still alive that’s pretty impressive considering not too many people still breath after taking a shot like that from Shizuku. I give you prompts.

*Yin-Yang takes out one of her daggers and stabs Isis in the leg*

(Isis): AHHHH~!

(Shizuku): Oh my. You have such a lovely scream. Let’s hear more of it.

*Mira and Yin-Yang pick up Isis and hold her while Shizuku punches her in the stomach. After a few punches Isis falls to the ground and gets picked back up by Mira and Yin-Yang again.*

(Mira): You’re quite tough to be able to take this much of a beating.

*Mira pulls all the dagger in Isis’ leg hoping to hear her scream again but Isis bites her lower lip to hold the pain in*

(Yin-Yang): Hey that’s no fun I was really hoping to hear you scream again.

(Isis): *Laughs* I won’t give you girls that satisfaction. *Smiles* If hearing me scream is the only thing that gives you girls pleasure than you’re just as boring as your master.

*Mira slaps Isis in on the cheek*

(Isis): *chuckles and smiles* The truth hurts doesn’t it 4 eyes?

(Mira): Shut up! *Mira grabs Isis and begins to choke her while Shizuku and Yin-Yang pull her off*

(Shizuku): Easily there Mira. It’s rare to see someone get under your skin like that.

(Mira): I know! This girl just pisses me off. Everything that comes out of her mouth agitates me to no end.

(Isis): Aww so the student council president is annoyed by little old me. I’m really sorry how about that. Here allow to make it up to you.

*As Isis is about to pull out her AI guns Yin-Yang throws shirikens at Isis knocking away the guns leaving Isis defenseless. Isis then gets attacked by Mira who escaped from Shizuku and goes right back to attack Isis but gets pulled away again by the others.*

(Isis): Well, this is somewhat disappointing.

(Yin-Yang): I can’t believe you’ve still got a mouth and on you despite everything that happened. You must be immortal or something.

(Isis): No. I just don’t fear death. I know that even if I get destroyed here master will destroy you and use the data from you to create a better more efficient AI than I. The fact that I lost to you three is proof that I failed in my programing. Although it was a short while I’m happy that I was able to review along aside my master.

(Nitsuj): And you’re going to keep reviewing along aside me until I say otherwise.

*Nitsuj comes crashing down dressed as Kirito from SAO*

(Isis): Master!

(Chibi Isis): Nii-chan! My message got to you!

(Nitsuj): Man, they really got you guys good. Chibi Isis heal up Isis for me while I take care of these guys.

(Isis): I don’t understand. How are you in the system?

(Mira): I concur how are you in the system it should be impossible for a human to enter here.

(Nitsuj): Oh that. Well after reviewing the first half of SAO I got interested in that Nervegear they used to go into the virtual world so I started tinkering with my own version of the Nervegear I like to call Nitsujgear which would allow me to dive into my system.

(Shizuku): So you mean-

(Nitsuj): That’s right sugar lips. After receiving Chibi Isis’ message I used my prototype to dive into the system and come to the rescue of my lovely assistants. This is my first time using the gear so even I was afraid it would fail and possibly fry my brains but it looks like all my calculations were right and my body is in a stable condition.

(Mira): I don’t believe this. The chances of you successfully doing a mind dive into the system for the first time without prior testing are 1 to a million. Not even are master has done something as crazy as this let alone even thought about something as this.

(Isis): See. Just like I told you. There’s never a dull moment with my master. Now what say we finish what we started ladies?

(Nitsuj): I couldn’t agree more. I don’t appreciate you ladies coming into my system and hurting my girls.

(Mira): You two take out Nitsuj and the small child and I’ll take care of the AI girl.

(Yin-Yang): But shouldn’t we stick to the original plan and-

(Mira): That bitch has been annoying me all day. I won’t be satisfied until I kill her myself.

(Shizuku): Oy, oy. So even you can get all hot and bother as well huh? Okay, do what you gotta do. This Nitsuj guy shouldn’t be a problem for me and Yin-Yang.

*Yin-Yang and Shizuku take on Nitsuj who stands there waiting for them to attack*

(Shizuku): You’re going down Nitsuj!

*Nitsuj does a quick dash past them and is able to get behind them easily*

(Nitsuj): I see. The red-hair one has shotgun gloves while the other one is a ninja wolf girl. Good concepts but their fighting is so flawed that they can’t hold a fight without teaming up with each other.

(Yin-Yang): What’d you say!

(Nitsuj): You guys have good fighting styles but your fighting abilities are way too low. So low that the only way you guys are able to fight is in a group as one. Shotgun girl the power, wolf girl the speed, and specs girl over there the mind. I guess your master didn’t take the time to fully develop you. Laziness on his part. Also, *grabs one of Shizuku’s boobs* these have way too much fat on them.

*Shizuku screams out of embarrassment from having someone besides her master touch her body and falls back clutching herself and almost to the brink of tears.*

(Shizuku): Unforgivable. I won’t forgive anyone who insults me or my master. I gonna crush you!

*Shizuku charges at Nitsuj prepare to unleash her ultimate attack but Nitsuj moves out of the way and grabs her arm tossing her to the ground*

(Nitsuj): Nitsuj Pulse!

*Nitsuj’s attack unleashes a powerful shockwave throughout Shizuku’s body knocking her out and paralyzing her.*

(Nitsuj): One down. One wolf girl to go. *Stares at Yin-Yang* Wolfy wanna go for a walk? *Whistles* Come girl let’s go. Let’s go for a walk. Let’s-

*Yin-Yang throws a dagger at Nitsuj which he dodges easily*

(Yin-Yang): Don’t you dare insult me like some house pet. I am a powerful ninja and you will fear me.

(Nitsuj): You know compared to the others you seem to have a lot more energy. You’re not in heat are you?

(Yin-Yang): Hoho, I am gonna enjoy slicing you into a thousand pieces.

(Nitsuj): Yep, you’re definitely in heat.

*After hearing Nitsuj say that Yin-Yang begins to unleash a fury of attacks on Nitsuj with him dodging all of them with ease*

(Nitsuj): Wolfy’s got claws. Chibi Isis what say you declaw her for me.

(Chibi Isis): AI twin sword style: Tsuin Ryun Kiba (Twin Dragon Fang) times 4!

*Chibi Isis splits herself into 5. Four of them attack Yin-Yang while the other stands by to ready a spell. The four attack Yin-Yang with a powerful slash attack across her chest which destroys her daggers.*

(Chibi Isis): AI magic arts: Burakkuhōru Nagareboshi (Blackhole Meteor).

*A mass of data appears which looks like a blackhole and falls on top of Yin-Yang knocking her out*

(Chibi Isis): Now to finish you off.

(Nistuj): Hold up Chibi Isis. I got an idea for these two.

*As their fight finishes Isis and Mira continue with Isis using her AI guns to destroy all of Mira’s endless blade disc*

(Isis): This is totally unexpected I always figured you were a calm demeanor person who never let anything get to you. I guess looks can be deceiving.

(Mira): I usually try to keep my emotions in check and stop myself from getting too emotional in my job so it doesn’t hinder me from doing what needs to be done. But I’m gonna enjoy watching you die. Ultimate disc technique: Full Body Blade!

*Mira’s body becomes covered in disc blades turning her body into a weapon*

(Isis): The same technique again? I swear the guy who created you had little to no imagination. Everyone knows using the same technique twice on a person never works.

(Mira): Shut up bitch! With this technique my body has become an unstoppable weapon. Not even your pitiful AI guns can penetrate me.

(Nitsuj): Hey Isis, how’s your fight going. You need me to jump in and help I know you hate getting dirty?

(Isis): That won’t be necessary. I can take down someone who uses the same technique twice very easily.

(Nitsuj): She used the same technique twice? Talk about zero imagination on the creator’s part as well as hers.

(Isis): I know, right?

(Mira): Shut up both of you! This technique easily destroyed that pitiful sword of yours last time and this time I’ll be destroying your body.

(Isis): Really? Than perhaps you won’t mind if I use my new sword to test out that powerful technique.

*Isis pulls out a rapier sword*

(Isis): Say hello to my second sword Icexcalibur. I hope you bought a coat because it’s about to get cold quite quickly.

*Isis charges at Mira who is confident that Isis won’t break her defenses and stands there waiting for her attack. Isis attacks her but nothing seems to have happen.*

(Mira): Ha! Is this the best you could do? Prepare to-

(Isis): AI sword style: Hyōga Jidai Tsundora (Ice Age Tundra).

*As Isis finished her sentence Mira’s whole body became covered in ice and she became frozen in a block of ice*

(Isis): Looks like she’s giving me the cold shoulder.

(Nitsuj): You stick to clever insults. Leave the cool one liners to me.

(Isis): Oh come on that was good what would you have said?

(Nitsuj): Hey look I’ve found the missing link. Talk about a frostbite. Now this is art I get. Tell me is this how you always look or are you just frozen with excitement to see me.

(Isis): Okay those were good.

(Nitsuj): How’s the new sword? Good thing I finish that bad boy up 2 weeks ago.

(Isis): I think I can rock with this. Where are the other two?

(Nitsuj): Taken care of. Now let’s move this girl to cold storage, I’m gonna see if I can crack their programs and see who sent them. You, stay here and get healed up by Chibi Isis *Nitsuj walks off taking the frozen Mira with him leaving Isis to get healed up by Chibi Isis*

*One hour later. Back in the real world*

(Isis): So master were you able to crack their programs and figure out who sent them?

(Nitsuj): No. The programs were very well encrypted, whoever created them wanted to make sure I couldn’t track them back to him.

(Isis): So what happen to them?

(Nitsuj): I pretty much removed them from the system, destroyed their bodies and programs in the process. We won’t be seeing them again.

(Isis): I still can’t believe you actually did a mind dive into the system like that. What were you thinking?

(Nitsuj): I was thinking about saving you guys. I had to do something after Chibi Isis’ message I couldn’t just leave you to die like that.

(Isis): But I’m just an AI you could have easily reused my data and created a better AI assistant who could-

(Nitsuj): IDIOT! Don’t ever talk like that! Haven’t you been watching my review of SAO? Even if you are an AI the feelings and thoughts you have are real! Even if the world says you are just bits of complicated data I will proudly stand up and say that Isis is a real girl. You laugh, cry, and get angry just like a real human being. You and Chibi Isis are both very important to me. Without you two I don’t think my reviews would have been as successful or as fun as they are now. Don’t ever forget that.

(Isis): Master. *Wipes tear from her eye* Understood. I’m sorry to have said something out of character like that.

(Nitsuj): Good! I’m going to continue to entrust you with my work. So heal up and get a good night’s rest because next week we are reviewing Arcana Familgia and I’m going to need a second host to help me with this one.

(Isis): You can count on me. Oh and master.

(Nitsuj): Yes?

*Isis kisses Nitsuj on the lips*

(Isis): Thanks for rescuing me today. I really appreciate it.

(Nitsuj): See, this is what I’m talking about. You are human.

(Isis): And don’t you forget it *disappears back into the system*.

The End

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