Project #243: Keijo

Hello and welcome to Project Nitsuj. Well guys we’re in the final week of the Fanservice arc. We’ve seen good, crappy, and somewhere in-between. Fanservice has managed to find its way into any genre of anime out there. Mecha, sci-fi, adventure, action, drama, comedy the list goes on. But the one genre I never thought would dip its fingers into fanservice would be the sports genre. Well they proved me wrong with the popular sports series Keijo. Keijo is a sports/ecchi anime that aired in 2016 under the production of Xebec (To Love-Ru) and is based off the manga under the same name written by Daichi Sorayomi from 2013-2017. During the mangas run it gained quite a bit of popularity as being a series that was heavy on fanservice but still managed to be entertaining and enjoyable to read for its intense action scenes, lovable characters, and a good story. Too bad the publishers didn’t think that. Despite the series being popular and gaining a bit of a following in Japan, the publishers didn’t think highly of the series and would usually put it towards the back of the magazine which was usually reserved for the least popular series. I don’t know if it was Daichi or the story but the publishers just didn’t like this series all that much and always gave him the shaft when he worked on the series even forcing him to bring it to a close in 2017 much to the surprise of the fans who as I said before really enjoyed the series. So, in honor of a man who poured his sweat, blood, and heart into creating a good fanservice series, let’s take a look at Keijo.

Opening and Ending Theme

The opening is “DREAMxSCRAMBLE” by AiRI. It’s okay, I like the drums and guitar in the song but other than that I found the song decent. I listened to it like once or twice and then skipped over it. I will admit it gets me bumped up to watch the anime. The ending is “Fantas/HIP Girlfriends!” sung by the VAs of the show who all sing the song incredibly well. I actually found myself listening to the ending more than I did the opening. It’s a light rock song and like I said before the VAs really sound great here. You can tell they were having a blast recording this.

Episodes 1-4

So the anime starts off with our main character Nozomi voiced by Lynn a girl who has dreams of being the richest Keijo player in Japan (too small, try the world). For those of you who don’t know what Keijo is, it’s a water sport where girls stand on a floating platform (called the Land) in the water. The goal is to knock your opponent into the water using only your butt and breast (it’s silly yes but it’s not as hard as you think). We quickly see that in this world Keijo is one of the most profitable sports in the world (Corbin: I will pour as much money as I must to make this a national sport in our world and I will be the owner of said organization). She gets accepted into a school that specializes in training Keijo players (the world of anime. Where even the most nonsensical things become reality) and once there we meet a few other characters such as Sayaka a prodigy in the sport who comes from a prestigious family and plays Keijo because she likes to wear cute swimsuits and wants to have her own designer someday to design her cute swimsuits to wear (a swimsuit fetish eh? Hot). She’s voiced by M.A.O. Hanabi voiced by Rena Maeda (Nike from The World is Still Beautiful) a friend of Nozomi who ranked third in the national entrance exams and with her is Mio voiced by Hibiku Yamamura who ranked first in the exams and seems to a foreigner who takes an interest in Nozomi because she’s cute and she likes to play around with cute girls (Baron: Hello~ favorite character). We see a lot of reporters interviewing students but nobody wants to interview Nozomi because she’s a no name and they think she got in here by luck but that’s not the case. We get a flashback to 6 months ago where Nozomi was doing a test with Sayaka and other students. They were doing a mock test on a road land. Similar to regular Keijo except each participant starts on a different island and you must make your way over to their island to knock them into the water by traversing narrow platforms (meaning you need to plan your moves carefully otherwise you could get trapped between players and be a sitting duck). You can of course knock your opponent into the water as they’re making their way over to you and as always the use of hands is prohibited (use those assets you’re all proud of. No pun intended). Nozomi makes the first move and tries to eliminate one girl but gets caught in a trap between the lands by two players but escapes using her amazing gymnastic skills (damn girl! Where were you at during the Olympics?) and then eliminates the two girls with a butt canon attack (dat ass counter: 1. Oh yeah, we’re gonna do a counter for every time we have a that dat ass moment). Sayaka’s also no slouch either as she takes out three opponents with her amazing butt skills she got from years of judo training (dat ass counter: 2). Back with Nozomi she gets trapped again only to get saved by Hanabi who strikes with her butt so fast that she knocks her opponents out (dat ass counter: 3). She basically strikes the front of the jaw with enough force which rattles the brain and knocks how opponent’s unconscious (which can actually be done in real life. A good hit to the jaw is enough to knock anyone out. This is why boxers and MMA fighters always protect their jaws when they fight. That and there’s a possibility of getting a tooth chipped). Nozomi and Hanabi go at it where Hanabi seems to have the advantage by aiming for all of Nozomi’s vitals to wear her down (it’s a game where you’re trying to throw your opponent into the water with just your butt or breast, why is it so intense?). Realizing she can’t beat Hanabi in the butt department Nozomi decides to switch to breast attacks but Hanabi shows she’s well skilled in that department as well and almost pushes Nozomi off the edge. With only a few seconds remaining Nozomi decides to go all out and attack. In a short amount of time Nozomi reads through all of Hanabi’s movements and catches her off guard (this is intense). Nozomi manages to get a hit in and goes in for the kill but Hanabi recovers, dodges her attack, and hits her with the butt to jaw smack knocking her out (dat ass counter: 4. Scene here: Despite losing Hanabi leaves impressed with Nozomi’s skills (she’s good, she just lacks discipline in the heat of power. (Corbin): With my help she could be the best in the game. (Nitsuj): With your help that girl’s safety would be in jeopardy) and Nozomi leaves with a new sense of purpose of wanting to get stronger and beat strong opponents like Hanabi. After the flashback Nozomi and Sayaka go to the dorms where they see they’re in room 309 the room for failures (thanks for the faith school) and meet their roommates Non a polite girl with a cute voice who is clumsy and Kazane a quiet shy girl who keeps to herself.

We start episode 2 with dat ass exercises (dat ass counter: 5). They do all the ass and breast exercises such as butt-sprinting, tire pushing with your butt and breast, and basic training as well (Corbin: Yeah work those butts ladies. (Baron): Shake that bottom dollar). After morning training they have classes in the afternoon where they learn about asstronomy and breastronomy (I’m learning so much about the physics of women. (Corbin): This should have been my major in college. (Nitsuj): You guys went to college? (Baron): Of course! We went to Jack University where I majored in fire magic and minored in magic science. (Corbin): I majored in ice magic and minored in magic communications). This process goes on for a few days until the instructors give them a new exercise which is learning the hip toss. In this exercise roommates will form a circle and pass a volleyball to each other using just their hips and butts (dat ass counter: 6). The goal is to perform 30 successful hip tosses and to make this even harder they’re doing this exercise on the beach where the wind current keeps shifting the ball. In order to adapt to this situation they appoint a leader to direct them as to where the ball is moving (good idea) and they elect Sayaka to be their leader (bad idea). Nozomi makes the suggestion that they should make Kazane their leader because she can read the wind patterns the only problem is Kazane refuses to talk so Nozomi decides to speak for her by following the movements of Kazane’s ponytail (the ponytail knows). The strategy works as they’re not only in perfect sync with each other but they get the highest count on the hip toss and even manage to get Kazane to speak where we find out the reason she didn’t want to talk was because of her accent which Nozomi unintentionally said was funny (not that she should talk. Seriously, if this anime gets a dub she’s gonna have cringe worthy southern accent. Just because she comes from the Kansai region doesn’t mean she needs a southern accent). The next day they finally get to go on the Land where Sayaka has noticed that Nozomi’s butt has gotten more muscle (dat ass counter: 7). The students get told they’re all going to be facing the teachers in a 1 on 4 match. Nozomi, Sayaka, Non, and Kazane take on Ujibe who used to be a legend in the early days of Keijo but over the years has gained some weight and become an unmovable force. During the match Nozomi does this powerful butt move that actually scares Ujibe and destroys the swimsuits of Sayaka, Non, and Kazane (Corbin): I love this anime. Dat ass counter: 8). Because of this Ujibe forces Nozomi to wear a training mail swimsuit.

In episode 3 Nozomi tosses out her hip but she gets a massage from Kazane (Corbin: Oh man I wanted to do that. (Nitsuj): You just wanted to feel up her bum. (Corbin): Yeah, I admit it. (Nitsuj): This is why you’re getting sued for that massage parlor incident). After the massage, we learn from Sayaka that there are three fighting styles in Keijo. The first is Infight which specializes in close-range combat and relies on pure strength to overwhelm their opponent and take them down (sluggers). The second is Outfight who keep at a distance and rely on speed to strike their opponents and take them down quickly (out-boxer). The final is Counter which uses the moves of your opponents against them and you swoop in to take them out (I say a combination of the swarmer and boxer-puncher. But that’s for cowards. Go for Infight or Outfight. (Baron): Particularly the Infight). As everyone wonders what Nozomi did last episode Hanabi comes in to tell her that the move was known as the Vacuum Butt Cannon a move that relies on rotational energy and strong hip twists to rip through the air creating a vacuum like attack. This move is so powerful that even professionals have trouble doing it but it’s said that whoever masters it will become a prize queen. While they talk an elite student named Rin the fastest Outfight player in western Japan (Baron: Dat ass is like a Gatling gun. Dat ass counter: 9. (Corbin): I think I’m in love) takes an interest in Nozomi and offers to train her going as far as insulting the regular students saying there’s no one with any skills which strikes a nerve with Sayaka who has decided to become an Outfight player and she may get her chance at proving Rin wrong with the class-change race an event where the regular students go up against elite students and have a chance to move into the elite class. So everyone starts to train. Sayaka begins training to increase her butt Gatling speed more than Rin (dat ass counter: 10) and Nozomi goes through her own kind of special training courtesy of Ujibe. After the events of last episode Ujibe tells Nozomi that she’s forbidden from using the vacuum butt cannon again because while it is a powerful move it causes tremendous amount of strain on the hip bones (which makes sense given what she’s doing to perform the move) and has even caused players to retire early (i.e Ujibe). Despite hearing all of this Nozomi is still determined to make the vacuum butt cannon hers and begs Ujibe to let her learn how to use it. Ujibe decides to test Nozomi’s resolve by having her wear the training mail swimsuit for one month. While the swimsuit may look goofy this swimsuit pretty much restricts all of Nozomi’s muscles that she can barely move in it. However, thanks to Kazane who has begun massaging people in order to gather data on their butts (it’s all about dat ass. Dat ass counter: 11) and her saying to relax more does Nozomi finally gain control of the swimsuit and move correctly. The day finally comes for the class-change race where 3 regular class students are put into a fight with one elite class student. Sayaka winds up in the group facing Rin and Nozomi faces off against Kotone the student who ranked second in the entrance exams. In the first race it’s Sayaka’s group vs Rin where they’re battling on the seesaw island and Sayaka goes directly for Rin at the start of the match.

At the start of episode 4 we see Rin dodge Sayaka’s initial attack and the other two competitors fall off the island thanks to the seesaw effect. Basically, the island is shaped liked a hemisphere so if the center of gravity is disturbed (i.e too much weight on one of the edges) the shaking becomes more violent and can be strong enough to toss you off the island. So the battle between who has the fastest butt in the west begins (Corbin: This is great. I want to use the bathroom but I ain’t moving from this spot). At first Sayaka and Rin are evenly matched but as the match goes on we see where Rin starts to beat Sayaka, lung capacity. In order to do the butt Gatling (dat ass counter: 12. Let’s just get that out of the way) it requires good lung capacity. While Sayaka can match Rin in speed she fails at beating her in lung capacity as Rin can do 100 Gatling shots in one breath (*Corbin begins to bow before Rin’s butt* I’m not worthy. I’m not worthy) and Sayaka doesn’t come close to matching that number (I assume). Sayaka goes on defense until the 30 second mark where she wedges up her swimsuit (*Corbin turns away from Rin’s butt and begins bowing before Sayaka’s butt* I’m not worthy. I’m not worthy. (Baron): You just have no loyalty do you?) activating her W-Acceleration mode. Just by giving herself a wedgie and exposing her ass (dat ass counter: 13) Sayaka becomes faster than Rin (because as we all know in anime, the less clothes shown the better your stats are. It’s the law of Shonen. (Baron): Is this a shonen series? (Nitsuj): Are men watching this? (Baron): Obviously. (Nitsuj): Than it’s a shonen) and manages to knock Rin off the island giving her the victory (viva la ass). After the match she gets an ass massage from Kazane (dat ass counter: 14) and we move to the next match which is Non’s match where she and two more girls are facing this muscle-bound elite student who can tighten her ass (dat ass counter: 15) so well that it becomes as hard as steel (Corbin: I’ve got some steel in my pants and it’s not government issued. (Nitsuj): . . .You know people often ask me if my reviews are family friendly, what am I supposed to tell them when you say stuff like that? (Corbin): It depends on your family and how dirty your mind is). Two girls get knocked out leaving Non by herself where the elite student attacks her but Non manages to absorb the attack with her soft butt (dat ass counter: 16) and reflects it back knocking the elite student off the waffle-like island and winning the match (hmm~ waffles). Kazane takes the island next on the pole-type land where the island is entirely composed of poles (Baron: Well yeah what were you expecting?) and she’s going up against Mio (well, she’s doomed). At first it seems like Kazane is fighting recklessly by taking on Mio herself but in truth she’s working together with the other participants to take down Mio. Thanks to the massages Kazane can actually predict all of Mio’s moves as well as the moves of everyone else she massaged in order to get data (note to self, when someone offers you a free massage don’t take it. It’s most likely a trap). They manage to force Mio into a corner with no escape but she begins swaying her boobs and hypnotizing Kazane and the others (Baron! No! Don’t stare at her boobs! (Baron): I can’t help it. . .they’re so big and beautiful). Kazane and the others are so mesmerized by Mio’s boobs that they can’t even move which allows Mio to walk up to them and push them off the poles (you win this time libido). The next match is finally Nozomi’s match and she’s going up against Kotone who as I said before came in second on the national exams meaning next to Mio she’s the strongest player in the school.

Episodes 5-8

In episode 5 Nozomi takes to the island to go up against Kotone who comes from a family of Keijo players but doesn’t really have a desire to be in the sport and would much rather listen to her BL novels (Baron: How dare she disrespect such a great sport. The nerve of some women). They’re battling on the fountain island which shoots out water making the island slippery. The match begins where Kotone doesn’t bother looking at her opponents and instead lets her butt (which she named Cerberus. (Corbin): That’s cool, I named my snowhood the Northern Lights. (Baron): Mine is called Krakatoa) do all the work. Apparently, the butt has a mind of its own (dat ass counter:17) and will seek out its opponents to devour and beat them. Despite this imposing force (of absurdity. (Corbin): Not for this guy) Nozomi is determined to face this beast and win. She actually manages to dodge all of Kotone’s attacks and even forces her to turn around where she does a shoryuken with her boobs (well I think I just found my new favorite street fighter move). Nozomi manages to survive the boob slaps (Baron: Tag me in Nozomi! Tag me in) and performs the vacuum butt cannon successfully but misses however she manages to hit it the second time destroying Cerberus and taking down Kotone to win the match (dat ass counter: 18). After the match Ujibe inspects Nozomi’s butt (in a very provocative position, where she says Nozomi’s butt has gained more muscle and is looking fine (  Dat ass counter: 19). As the episode comes to a close we find out that our heroines all passed and became elite students including Kazane (they never said you had to win. You just had to show off your skills). While it’s true Kazane lost overwhelmingly to Mio (Baron: Can you blame her? No man, woman, or child could deny those boobs) she was able to push her into a corner. Not to mention that boob hypnosis thing is a forbidden move in Keijo (so you know, disqualified).

In episode 6 the elite class has gone to Kyoto for a training camp. While there Nozomi will be training as an Infighter and will be sharing a room with Mio (be sure to sleep with one eye open). While at the camp they get trained by a professional Keijo player named Kyouko known as the Missile Lady of Kyoto and the most popular player in Kyoto at the moment. She trains the infighters and takes them on in one on one competition where Nozomi can’t even land a single hit on her and gets defeated by one attack (that is one powerful butt). Kyouko acknowledges that Nozomi has good skills however she doesn’t know her own flaws which will stop her from becoming a pro unless she realizes what they are.

At the start of episode 7 Nozomi asks Sayaka what she thinks of her body (hot! (Baron): Sexy! (Corbin): I want to eat off it and then melt on it. (Nitsuj): I am seriously thinking about putting a PG-13 rating on any of my blogs that involves you guys). Nozomi completely strips down naked in front of Sayaka making her feel uncomfortable (and jealous) until she kicks Nozomi out of the room. After getting a full explanation of what’s going on, Sayaka tells Nozomi to just watch Kyouko and study her movements. While training the next day Nozomi finally figures out the flaw of her body, her butt is too thick (Corbin: You shut your mouth! There’s no such thing as too much butt). This is all due to the butt vacuum cannon, while she gained more muscle and power she lost her speed and mobility making her slower (it’s basically a trade in. More power at the cause of speed) and her moves are more predictable. In order to get pass this obstacle Kyouko tells Nozomi she must push her butt to the absolute limit so the next day she begins to teach Nozomi the Butt Flash a new way to attack. Her training for this will be pulling out turnips from the ground using just her butt (dat ass counter: 20). She destroys a lot of turnips and for each one she destroys she has to buy them (let’s not waste food now okay). After getting a hint from Mio about using the muscles in her butt, she finally figures out that the key is momentum (Baron: Wasn’t that obvious? I figured that out a long a time ago. (Corbin): I could have told her that from the start). She finally pulls out a lot of turnips perfectly mastering the butt flash. At the end of the episode their teachers announce that on the last day of the training camp (which is for this big event between their school and their rival school in the east) they’re going to have the students square off against each other and to add a little excitement they’re free to choose their opponent. One of the students Usagi challenges Nozomi, why, because she’s a Mio admirer and is jealous that Mio is always playing with Nozomi.

At the start of episode 8 we get our match between Nozomi and Usagi where we see thanks to Usagi’s small body she’s quite light and fast. Even with Nozomi’s new skill the butt flash which moves her butt at incredible speed that it looks like a jab (dat ass counter: 21) she still only manages to hit Usagi a few times. Nozomi manages to win via knock out by dropping the full weight of her butt on Usagi (Corbin: Oh~ that’s one of the top 11 ways I want to die) and after the race we see she’s developing a crush on Nozomi (I approve). A month passes and it’s time for East meets West showdown where we find out the west (which is Nozomi’s team) haven’t won a single time against the east. Because of this the instructors and players of the east disrespect the west and Nozomi and the other no longer able to sit by and be mocked confront the east where one of the players knocks Nozomi back with a fart (it might have been a butt tap but I swear she farted on Nozomi) but she gets a shot in by ripping off a piece of her clothing. Before things turn into an all-out brawl Mio creates a sandstorm with her butt (dat ass counter: 22. (Baron): And here I thought she was all about the breast) and the instructors break it up. While they appreciate the students coming to their defense they want them to win on the Land. After this we learn that the races this year will be team battles with 4 members a group and the team that wins two races wins the war. Sayaka, Mio, Kotone and Mari (some random side character) are put on team one, team two is Atsuko (steel butt lady), Usagi, Kazane, and Non, and the final team is Rin, Saya, Hanabi, and Nozomi. The day of the match arrives where we see Sayaka’s dad has come who doesn’t like the sport and thinks it’s all childish fanservice (he’s not far off from the truth). The first race will be played on the jungle gym which is literally a jungle gym (they really put a lot of thought into these Lands. Give them an A for creativity).

Episodes 9-12

The race begins in episode 9 with the random girl on Sayaka’s team getting taken out by twins (a little twin magic. (Corbin): Double the booty, double the pleasure) but they retaliate by taking out a member of the east with a triple butt attack (too much booty for her to handle. Dat ass counter: 25). With both sides even the twins take on Mio (we’ll at least someone will be having fun) while Sayaka and Kotone take on Nanase who has the innate power to see the hard and soft parts of a person’s body and where they’re putting all their power at. This technique allows her to counter attacks and take little to no damage at all while her opponent feel the brunt of the attack (Baron: So it’s like having a scouter. Instead of reading power levels it instead reads butt levels). Kotone takes her on while Sayaka recovers from using her wedgie technique where despite Kotone’s best efforts she was no match against Nanase and loses. Luckily, Kotone bought Sayaka enough time to recover and she does her W-acceleration technique again only this time she does a deep wedgie so deep that she actually tears the bottom part of her swimsuit (dat ass counter: 26. Talk about a wardrobe malfunction). Sayaka overwhelms Nanase with her speed and almost knocks her overboard but her legs give out and Nanase dishes out the pain with her own butt Gatling attack (dat ass counter: 27). Sayaka still stands and puts all of her energy into her nipples (Baron: Krakatoa is about to erupt again. (Nitsuj): I can’t believe I’m about to ask this but when was the first time? (Baron): All the way back in 1883. (Nitsuj): Oh. (Baron): And once again during the boob hypnosis. (Nitsuj): Alright that’s it. This blog is rated PG-13. Anybody 13 or younger please get an adult if you wish to keep reading this blog. Anybody older than 13, you’re all good) and she takes out Nanase by using her nipples to grab the top of Nanase’s swimsuit and hit her with a judo throw (nice~! You remembered your roots). Mio takes out the twins by hitting all their pleasure spots with her butt and sending them over the edge (dat ass counter: 28) giving the west the first race. Even Sayaka’s dad congratulates her on the victory.

In episode 10 we move on to the second race which will be held on top of two aircrafts (not as inventive as the jungle gym but still an interesting setup). At first it seems like our girls from the West are struggling as the East players get them all into one on one fights where they have the advantage. They have a girl who believes in fairies, hypnotizes herself and can also make her butt hard (dat ass counter: 29), a girl who can light butts on fire (dat ass counter: 30. (Corbin): Okay, no dry grinding for you) and the other two girls really don’t have any special moves except for the one who twists her boobs like a wind-up toy to give them a vortex-like attack (Baron: Wow, even I question this). While the East think they’ve got things under control little do they do they’ve fallen into a trap and two of the members get flung off the land leaving only the fairy girl and the wind-up girl to fight. Atsuko gets taken out and the West splits up where Non and Usagi take on the fairy girl and Kazane takes on the wind-up girl (the animators had a field day with this episodes because what happens is some of the craziest stuff this anime has done yet). Okay, while Usagi and Non take on the fairy girl Kazane unleashes her new attack, Gate of Bootylon (I swear on my life I am not making this up. That is literally the name of her move. I couldn’t make this stuff up even if I wanted to. (Corbin: I could), a move that allows her to perfectly copy the moves of her classmates and how did she learn their moves, by feeling up all their butts which they allowed her to do (dat ass counter: 31. It should be higher but I have no idea how many elite students they have). Thanks to this Kazane manages to keep up with wind-up girl and Non comes to help her out after Usagi took herself and the fairy girl’s flappy butt (dat ass counter: 32) out of the race. Wind-up girl manages to push Non off the land but before falling she tips the balance of the plane disrupting the attack of wind-up girl and allow Kazane to attack with the boob dunk (Baron: 10 points and Sportscenter top 10 play candidate). They both get knocked into the water and at first it seems like Kazane won since the wind-up girl hit the water first but no it was Kazane. The wind-up girl used her wind-up boob to create a small whirlpool which kept her from hitting the water a split second before Kazane giving the East the win (barely).

It’s time for the final race in episode 11 and they’re battling on top of a castle (my God whoever designs these lands is creative. Whatever they’re getting paid isn’t enough). Everybody gets in to one on one battles where Nozomi takes on the girl who farted on her in episode 8 whose named is Maya and is the second best student in the east and is quite empty inside due to the fact that no one can stand up to her. After examining and getting a whiff of her butt (dat ass counter: 33. (Corbin): What I wouldn’t give to be in Nozomi’s position) Nozomi figures out the secret to her powerful butt strikes. The secret is she knows how to use Qigong techniques an ancient Chinese martial art/health care techniques which are a combination of physical postures, breathing techniques, and focused intentions. Basically, Maya is releasing spiritual energy from her butt and breast to fight (the founders of Qigong are rolling in their graves right now). Despite knowing how her technique works, Nozomi just can’t get a hit in. We see Rin and Hanabi have trouble against their opponents as well. Hanabi takes on a magician girl who can pull cards out of her butt (Corbin: Oh~ what else you got in there?) and can show people illusions with her breast (Baron! Don’t- *turns to see Baron drooling while in a daze* never mind). The secret to her attack is she’s bouncing the sunlight off her oiled breast to blind everyone (Baron: Beep. . .beep. (Nitsuj): My thoughts exactly Baron) and combined with her teammate their attacks have Rin and Hanabi backed into a corner. Rin manages to counter her boob flash by tossing her top into the sunlight and using her butt Gatling attack (dat ass counter: 34) to remove the oil and stop her boob flash (Baron: Huh? What happened to me? Oh look boobs). This doesn’t seem to faze the magician girl and her assistant as they combine with each other by sharing the same trunks (Baron: Man, I must really be out of it cause I could of sworn I saw a girl jump into another girl’s swim trunks). Hanabi and Rin get pushed near the edge but get saved by Saya the fourth member of the team who is a samurai girl and uses her breast as a sword (sure, why not?). She takes out the magician girl and Hanabi and Rin take out the assistant leaving only Maya on the titan girl to fight. To make the match more interesting for everyone eliminated the land begins to sink. Back with Nozomi and Maya the two buck butts as Nozomi uses her vacuum attack on her. Instead of dodging it Maya just blocks it with her butt even though she can easily dodge it. The reason for this is because she feels that if she dodges it’ll be seen as a loss which is something she won’t accept. You see, in the past everyone including her parents were afraid of her. She had no place in the world until her instructor came and recognized her abilities. To her, losing is not an option and just when it seems like she’s about to lose to Nozomi, she switches personalities and her hair goes from blonde to silver (nobody is going to question this?).

In the final episode, we find out that this silvered haired girl is Maya’s other personality Kaya and she is the number one student in the east. Maya created Kaya as a way to protect her from the dangers of the world that hated her so whenever Maya feels in danger Kaya comes out to protect her (and since Nozomi was the one who hurt Maya she just made the list of people Kaya’s gonna kill). Kaya sends her titan teammate overboard and then focuses her attention on Nozomi and the others where she actually blocks Saya’s boob slash with her own boobs tossing her overboard, catches Rin’s butt with her boobs and begins crushing it with said boobs (Baron: Do me next! Do me next), and even takes a critical hit from Hanabi which doesn’t faze her one bit (well that’s one way to quickly establish the final boss of this season). Nozomi, Hanabi, and Rin team up to take her down but even with their combined might (and defying the known laws of physics. (Corbin): With their butts and breast. God I love this anime) they’re still no match for Kaya. Hanabi realizes that the only person who stands a chance at beating her is Nozomi (she is the main character after all) so before getting thrown overboard (Rin gets beaten up and falls. Medic) she uses Rackupressure on Nozomi which heals her hip and gives her an adrenaline rush where her speed and strength have gone up big time bringing out her full power 100% (in short, Kaya is about to get rekt). Nozomi is able to go toe to toe with Kaya but she calls out Maya telling her to stop being a coward and face her (you’re the coward Nozomi. You’re going up against the best player in the east and yet you wanna go up against the second-best player. Fail on your part). They charge up for one final attack where we will finally answer one of life’s greatest mysteries. What is stronger, the butt or the breast (*Nitsuj and the Jack Bros. hold hands to bear witness to this great mystery*). Charging up the vacuum butt cannon, Nozomi charges head first where she gets caught by Maya’s breast deflecting the cannon away. However, the rotational energy gets transferred into Nozomi’s breast and makes it all the way to her nipple giving more than enough power to blow Maya overboard (Baron: HA! So breast are stronger than the butt. I knew it! *Corbin falls to his knees in shame* (Corbin): Noooooooooooooooo~. (Nitsuj): Yes). So the west wins the war and after the war they have a banquet and socialize with each other becoming good friends and everything (if only real wars were like this). After this a year passes and everyone has graduated and become a pro. But before making their debut in the pro league they have to do a month long introductory course in their respected home regions and then they’ll debut around Golden week.

Final Thoughts

(Baron): Good God, this anime was awesome.

(Nitsuj): No lie there. Keijo is a fanstastic anime from beginning to end. It has good characters, story, action, and over the top fun. I do like how everyone starts off in the middle. They’re not too strong but they’re not too weak. They’re all somewhere down middle and slowly start to perfect their fighting style which is different from each other. Nozomi comes off as that typical shonen protagonist who works her butt off to keep up and surpass those around her but what makes her different is that she’s not doing because she wants to be the best or the strongest, she just wants to be rich playing sport that she loves and there’s nothing wrong with that. In a way, I’m in the same position as her, I would love to get rich from my site but I know the only way I’ll do that is if I keep working hard and dishing out entertaining content after entertaining content and increasing my viewership. Sayaka is also a hard worker and rival of Nozomi who fights to gain the approval of her father and show everyone that she’s not doing this for fun, she’s here because she wants to be here and because she wants to be one of the bests. Kazane was the one girl who surprised the me the most and probably the one character who grew the most out of the main cast. She starts off as a timid girl afraid to speak but slowly becomes this tactical genius who’s able to take down even the strongest of opponents with her mind. It’s nice to see a tactician character done right and actually not be seen as a weakling who’s only use is to spout out commends and be completely useless when in a brawl. Non was the weakest character out of the main cast but despite this I still found her enjoyable. She’s a clumsy girl who’s clumsiness winds up being the downfall of her opponents and it’s funny how she always tries to justifies her own clumsiness to save face. The rest of the side characters. I like how some of them have their own backstories, arcs, and fighting styles which makes them stand out and become more memorable as the series goes on. Also, the characters have dialects. Usually animes have the characters speak properly but here, they actually let the characters speak in their own dialect.

The fight scenes were also fun and great as well. While the animation can look a little off at times in the fights, they’re still awesome to watch. The speed, movements, and speed of each fight is great and intense to watch. The fight scenes are over the top, the moves are especially over the top but at the same time it’s entertaining, enjoyable, and fun to watch.  I especially love the various lands they all fight on. They were creative and I love how the players were able to adapt to each land perfectly in order to fight. As far as fanservice goes, this anime is full of it. It’s an ass and titty fest all throughout the anime and it’s executed well. So far, this is the best execution of fanservice I have seen in an anime.

The animation for the most part is good. Like I said before there are a few parts that look weird such as a character not being animated properly or a land looking like crap in the early episodes but other than that the animators embrace the insanity and fun this series has to offer and really bring their A game when comes to the fight scenes (which shouldn’t come as a surprise seeing as how the animators worked on the To Love-Ru series). The music is good but unfortunately forgetful. While watching the anime you’ll like the music but you’ll quickly forget it after watching the episode. This is one of Xebecs major problems when it comes to anime and hopefully they do something about this in the future.

Final Score

The final score for Keijo is a 7/10.

(Corbin): With a Jack Bros. seal of enjoyment.

(Nitsuj): Is this anime for everyone? No. If you’re one of these guys who hates fanservice animes and thinks it’s a waste of time, chances are you won’t enjoy this anime. But if you’re someone who just wants to watch something that’s not too serious, don’t mind fanservice, and fun to watch than I think this anime is for you. It’s a shame that this series and the author didn’t get the proper respect and support from their publisher but at least it got the support and respect from its fans and I wish Daichi in whatever project he does next.

(Shizuku): Hey boss, you got some guys in suits outside looking for you and the Jacks.

(Nitsuj): Oh no.

*Nitsuj and the Jack Bros. go outside*

(Nitsuj): My God is them.

(Baron): Who are these guys the FCC?

(Nitsuj): Worst. They’re. . .the Japanese Censorship yakuza.

(Corbin): Japanese Censorship yakuza?

(Nitsuj): They’re the guys who keep censoring anime, hentai, and doujins. Anything consider too ecchi or pornographic gets censored by these guys. Mysterious White Light, Fog with a mind of its own, Annoying Black Bar, and Pointless Mosaic.

(White Light): We got word someone was watching uncensored anime in the area.

(Black Bar): And harboring uncensored pirated hentai.

*The Jack Bros. tilt their heads sideways*

(Nitsuj): What the fuck you guys?

(Baron): I’m sorry. When you took down that PJ guy, we took a few of the DVDs for our enjoyment.

(Corbin): It was only 20, nobody would have missed it.

(Mosaic): We demand that you cease the watching of the uncensored anime and return the pirated hentai.

(Baron): Never! You all burn in Hell!

(Fog): Than you give us no choice.

*Black Bar, Fog, and Mosaic charge at Nitsuj and the Jack Bros. where a fist fight erupts between them. The AI girls stand by the door watching as the violence erupts between them*

(Yume): You know for beings who are all about censorship they sure do know how to fight violently.

(Chibi Isis): Should we help them?

(Isis): No, we have no horse in this race. Besides it’s more fun to watch.

(Seras): I’m just waiting for White Light to make its move. He’s just standing there doing nothing. You know he’s gonna do something and it’s gonna be cool.

*As soon as Seras finishes her sentence, White Light makes its move with a battle cry and charges into battle attacking Nitsuj and the Jack Bros. with crazy moves all while flipping through the air*

(Yin-Yang): Ohhhh~ Goddamn!

*Nitsuj gets back up after being knocked down*

(Nitsuj): Come here you little squirt.

(Mira): Well this could take a while. Thanks for reading, and we’ll see you next time on Project Nitsuj.

*White Light goes crashing through the window and lands by Shizuku*

(White Light): Forgiveness, please.

*White Light bows its head while apologizing and returns to the fight outside*

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